Many people believe that they can "talk their way out" of fighting, and as a long as the other person is willing to cooperate it can work very well. Deescalation is a basic self-defense skill, and should be practiced and trained with just like an other skill or piece of equipment.

1. Have a plan. Know what you are going to say to deescalate a situation, and have an idea of the expected response. Know what you are going to do if you don't get a response that meets with your expectations.

2. Deescalate preemptively. As soon you get the idea that somebody might be a potential threat begin deescalation. "Sorry, my mistake." Keep it short. They don't need an excuse, an explanation, or your life story.

3. Deescalate with appropriate body language. Your body language should be consistent with the message you are trying to send. Deescalation is generally submissive, so apologizing from an aggressive posture will probably be regarded as a challenge or sarcasm.

4. Deescalate while moving. There is no reason to stay where you are. At a minimum get more distance, ideally get some object between you and the potential threat. Don't turn your back to the threat until you are well away.

5. Don't debate. Don't be sucked into a discussion. Some people need to work themselves up to the point of fighting, don't stoke the fire. A discussion where you are formulating your answers will take your attention away from the other things you need to be doing.

6. Disassociate. Deescalation doesn't have to mean anything. You don't have to mean everything you say, you are just feeding the threat some soothing words and behavior to make the threat feel like they have won before anything bad has happened.

7. Know when it's over. Many times somebody that has been talked out of fighting still needs to vent. Don't get pulled back into the process. They can have the last word.

8. Know when to transition. If deescalation isn't doing the trick it is time to change to something else. Verbal commands ("Stay there!", "Stop!", etc.) and maybe physical skills, or defensive tools, or the tried and true running away are all solid choices.

9. Know when deescalation isn't going to work. Without a safe distance to apply your deescalation skills you should skip it, and transition to something else right away.